Mens Secret Cries - All is well that ends well 2

'Are you going to stay in Luanshya or what?' Linda asked guiltily. She averted her eyes from the man she had grown to love so dearly. There was never a right time to say goodbye. It felt wrong to remind him that her time was up and that her journey had to continue. How could she leave him when the pain he was in was so real? it had barely been a week since her dear friend passed. Her body was not even yet cold in the ground. Linda struggled with the uncomfortable vibe that could be cut with a knife. She shuffled a little on the bed and sat on her hands to stop them from trembling.

Bwembya sat up and stretched his body as though he was determined to get rid of his limbs and exist in his own arena. He slowly dragged  his head in her direction.

'Are you late for your Livingstone trip?' he rasped at her. The voice had not been heard in a week. it startled her to note that it could still make a noise. She shyly nodded and fought with the tension that was noting her stomach. A hand rested on her cold shoulder and pulled her in closer. The hand turned her face towards the man she loved. She longed to kiss the pain away and hold him.

'I am so sorry but I will have to leave and go for work. I did not know how else to ask. You know I am rubbish with choosing the right words.  I don't know what you need right now or how I can make things better but I do know that I would like to swap places with you just to ease the pain. Just to take on your burden. I feel your pain but I know it is no where near the extent that you feel it. I am sorry baby...'

'I know. Don't be sorry because it is not your fault. You are everything I need. I have everything that I need right he and now.' He took her face in his hands and kissed her longingly. She gasped as she was consumed by his determined tongue. He softly pulled away and looked her in those big brown wet eyes. 'Would you like me to stop?' he rasped. Her eyes still closed, she tilted her head and leaned it on his warm hand. She felt at home in his arms. Completely safe. More than she had ever felt in her entire life. This must be what was meant by being in love. There had never been anything that had ever come close to this feeling of utopia. A foreign concept in her lonely world. When she did not answer, his mouth devoured her again passionately. Chris was long forgotten. There was no doubt in her heart that his mouth was where it belonged and when it explored her neck, she let it discover her weak spots without a fight. The first time since they had been together, their minds and souls where intertwined.

In that moment there was no more need for talking. No more need to dwell on the pain. She had fought away the debris that was now attempting to keep them apart. He was a master yet her naive mind had always believed that he was innocent. His lips rested weightlessly upon hers and gently but determinedly made their intentions known. His hands began to roam softly over her and reminded her to pull back. This was not the answer. This was not what he needed. He needed to be alone.

'Baby this is not what you need. You need to heal.'

'And what better way to heal than with you?'

'Yes but about when I head back home what is going to happen?'

'You are not leaving me here. You are going to Livingstone and then coming back right here to me.'

'In Luanshya?'

'No in my arms. I had to be here for the funeral but I have requested to be transferred back to Lusaka.'

'Right but stop with the caressing and let us talk a moment.'

'Life is too short for constant talking.'

'Well if you want to be with me then you need to learn to address things and not just leave them hanging.'

'Dammit Linda! What do you want me to do?  I have lost Tasha but I have made my mind up not to lose you but it is like you are always doubting me? Why do you not trust me?'

'Baby I trust you but that is not an excuse that you can use every time you want to avoid confrontation. Just relax. I am right here.'

Bwembya opened the drawer of his bedside table. Great he was avoiding issues again She hated it when he did that but she knew she had to be patient with him. He turned round to face her again holding something in his hand.

'I know you think I have been a bit distant lately. I just wanted to be sure about things and I never meant for any of it to ever hurt you but stupidly as a man I manged to mess things up anyway. I am not proud of the pain I put you through but with everything I am and everything we have been through as friends, I have no doubts that it is you I want in my corner everyday of my life. You are my ka besty, my honey honey, my sugar sugar and my everything. I want everyone to know how I feel about you not just as my girl but as my wife....'

'Bwembya what are you on about? Are you saying what I think you are saying?' she quipped in a tremor. He opened his hand and brought out a magnificent ring.

'It belonged to my mother. It was the most precious thing she had given me to give the one who would carry my name, my family and be the main woman in my life. Linda baby, as I kneel down in this miserable room, please say you will do me the honors of extending your full of gestures finger that has loved and cussed me to the earth and back and let me wife you like we were meant to be.'

Silence.

'Please say something. Is it the timing? I have told your mother and Sandra and we have their blessings. Please say you will.'

'When did you have time to do all that?'

'See I told you you doubt me too much. But that is one of the many reasons I love you. You dont let me off the hook easily.'

'Yes....baby. The answer is a full and uncompromisable yes.'

Bwembya pulled her into his arms and sealed the love with a kiss that would bind them forever. The anxiety he had felt all week was not due to the funeral. It was the fear of losing yet another of his loved ones. The struggles and emotional dramas had been worth it to get this one. She was his and he was comforted.