My Father

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There is no describing my old man….
from when i can remember this was the voice in my growth
the inspiration in my voice
and the wisdom in my choice
Oh yes we interlocked like a set of hands
that are perfectly fitted for one another
my father knew just how to tickle me
for just a few seconds
and yet give me the most memorable laughter
Its no wonder I could never wait till the end of school
with my dress in my sachet
and at the sound of the bell
I changed as fast as superman
and the run to his work
was as fast as the ‘jamaican rocket’.
No I could never wait to spend time with this man
he understood my every smile
and tolerated my little habits
for a time
and when I thought I was getting away with murder
I was in fact heading for a lesson I would carry for life
My father loved to hear me read
hang on…just my voice was enough to brighten his day
no matter what unpleasant noise i made
he looked forward to coming home
and at every 7 pm allow me to take off his shoes
and ease his feet
Yes my father taught me how to understand a man
because I knew when he needed space
if he was watching the news
not even I could distract him
but he loved me
ah my lovely old man
he watched me try to elongate myself
as I tried desperately to touch the chandelier in our home
he would laugh and giggle and encourage me that one day I would
My father got impatient with me
but only when I gave up on myself
he carried me when I was tired
and I still remember his roller coaster rides
on his broad shoulders
come on now..I even have his legs
yes in the lady form
but with them come the strength that can only be my father
Oh yes he was strong…I saw the veins on his arms
popping out defiantly
and I first understood the difference between woman and man
the reason I had to understand my place
and confidently appreciate some authority.
He always let me speak out
would listen to me talk gibberish
but would teach my tongue eloquence
by letting me recite poetry to his students.
my father understood the intricate beauty of my soul
and the trivialities that would appear complex to the naked eye
He saw past my physical
and what was expected of a girl child
but inspired me to be the best girl child I could be
My relationship with my father is the greatest.
by tolerating me
he drew me closer,
by firmly telling me he needed his space
he allowed me happiness when I spent quality time with him
I would look forward to it hence the running to work after school
I was not afraid to love him
because he allowed me to understand his emotions
in his own way
I could never have enough of my father
even in my dreams I dreamt of when next he would be home
to let me sit on his lap and hear me read
to be proud of me
and remind me that am the only jewel of my kind
I knew when my father was hurting
but all he required from me was a little hug
or hard work at school
to remind him it was not all bad
The happiness I gave him
because he allowed me to
was his foundation to making me happy
my father discovered the key to keeping a smile on my face
was sharing my happiness
and providing hope that
everyday was a different challenge
but with equal solution
Yes it all been in past tense this story
but that’s because the history is also the present
my father knows no distance
I have not always been around him physically
but he allows me to embrace his spirit
and knows how to carry my smile in his day
my heart in his pulse
and my love engulfs us even across the seas.
My father is and always will be
my perfect friend.

SOMETIMES

sometimes you sit back and take
one step at a time
sometimes you sit and sigh
but pretend to be fine

sometimes you look at life
and feel it rife
sometimes you strive
for a smile to strike

sometimes you give
never expecting to receive
sometimes you believe
emotions can't be sieved

sometimes you have it all
a life you cannot throw
sometimes you pick at all
so you can find a negative flaw

sometimes you block today
by living in yesterday
sometimes you block your harvest
by eating yesterdays dry bones

sometimes today tries
to eradicate yesterdays lies
sometimes our eyes
fear for our lives

sometimes we cling on yesterday
and make excuses today
sometimes to remain unhappy
or too afraid to deserve happiness

sometimes today gets tired
when it tries it gets fired
sometimes your yesterday hires
a love u once admired

sometimes today understands
its not enough to just try
so it backs off and waits
until your sometimes decides to be an always.

Dedication to the husband God has reserved for me

He is
the one that possess 80% of my what i need
that the 20% left is unnecessary
constantly knowing and understanding
how to fulfil the remainders of the 20

He is

the one that understands 20 won't come over night
but he has the patience and willingness to study hard
and get his 1st degree
a student of autonomy
that understands its philosophy

He is

the one that does not fear the words of a woman
nor taking a virtuous one as a cumbersome duty
like a monkey he learns the skill of unravelling
the beauty that lies within until you eventually
don't have to go through the unravelling ritual

He is

the man that understands beauty as not surface but appreciates
the outside right to the core of the inside
the one that does not fear a woman catering to him
nor does he fear its her way of obtaining the house key

He is

the man that dreams of his woman
that counts his blessings by understanding the wonderful
creation God has taken time to make just for him
and looks forward to every hug and warm embrace when she is absent.

Oh he is

the one that feels his soul lonely in the absence of his queen
but is not overtaken by cravings of others
nor does he deem his loyalty a prison
knowing no woman can ever match up to the beautiful design he wears

He is
the one that looks in his woman's eyes and understands her touch
when she looks in his eyes he is not afraid to melt
he knows the trust she holds is the bedrock of his heart
when she smiles and says 'I love you'
he drops every old pain and lets her wash him new
and every kiss and hug is a rebirth of the man he has always been
but never had the courage to reveal

HE IS

a man amongst men
and the only one of his kind.

I

I
love the things that are simple
but complex
the things that are relaxed and fear nothing
except what they can't see

I
love those that see me as an extraordinary gift
and take time to understand my many sides
they embrace my beauty in any form it comes
they know when am smiling
and when my smile is being a cloud
and when I go silent
but say the most
they know when I stutter
and when am saying shit because the friend of the month is here
when they understand that I
am love and lovable
just as i am.
they know sometimes i talk the most
but in your silence i still listen
that i don't remember all that is said
but the important never leaves me
that I'm one hundred percent woman
just one in a million

I
love a challenge
sometimes hate ambiguity
but in it's weirdness i find something to love about it
I love giving the best
and receiving the better
I love lions
and a little authority to tame me
i can be unpredictable and extreme
but the extremity requires the simplest answers

I
love to find beauty in all
my happiness is overwhelming
but the easiest to deal with
once you discover the skill
its the best evolution


I
love courage and embrace free minds
moving only at will and not because
its imposed
standing up for what is wanted
fighting for what is needed

I
love exercising patience
and not running from what i know
is rightfully mine
the thrill of learning me
knowing i can never be alone
because there's me myself & I
i look in the mirror and each day the love grows
she smiles back at me
and is ready to face another day

I
love the things that don't compromise
but regulate
the things that are unique
and not uniform
they work when they want
but speak with the eloquence of Shakespeare

I
love kindness and hate envy
never boasting but ever hopeful
a warm embrace and lots of affection
its purpose understood
as a part of me that cannot be separated
only engulfed
tasty to the bone like oxtail stew
there's nothing like an empowering love
that flows when needed
and is not afraid to show

I
love the things that don't give up easy
honesty without selfish gain
things that don't tell the 'truth'
to justify the evil of the subconscious

I
love the idea of happiness
but believe in happiness being me
the rest is just the icing on the cake

I...I..I
I just love me =)

No More

My soul does not cry out in pain any more
no do i hear the words in my head saying
shawty why can't you smile no more?

No more do i feel the terror of a beaten down heart
nor the silent thunder of a beating drum
because in a divine era I have become my own master

No more do I seek the comfort of fools
to revive the me that's chocking inside
no more do i measure my smile
at the degree of your contention

No more do I speak the negative words
that are only held as entertainment for limited minds
that see not beyond what the naked eye restricts

Mine is a joy that will sing always
reviving each day as magical as a phoenix
depicting not just a magnificent smile
but illuminating the very essence that is me
which only few are blessed to see

because my soul cries NO MORE!!

Defected Ego

The next dice rolls masked by the deliberate whisk of my arm
a cold smile frozen by the sweet sounds of your lyrical betrayal

See I
understand the words spoken by poets
and the meaning unwritten by the writers of songs
of a defected ego
that display the note, the rhythm, the beat, the tempo, the heightened pride of nothing but a defected ego

See I

understand the flow of a river
and perhaps I could comprehend the battle between rain and ocean
trying to figure out which is the mightier
I can understand the oceans ambition to consume every rain drop
despite the risks of swelling up
and drowning in the land
and I
can make sense of natures career to bombard a nation
and then attempt to fix it
hell i could even try to understand why a tree chooses to be naked in winter

but what I do not know how to do is

understand the speech of the foolish
the reasoning of the selfish and the ludicrous pretentious of walking in your own shadow
when all it now depicts is a dark mirror to your core
where masked by sweet lies and haughty pride
you are prisoner to your defected ego

Lets play dice once more
what will you throw? 2 lies or six? either way you've missed
my hands are held across my face
to you only the back of it now shows
estranging your existence because
you see we two sides of the same coin
mine is always the tail but my head can not be injured by a defected ego

A woman of my own substance
my eyes know not the waters of my soul
they remain hidden
in the tributaries of my spirit
and not that of a defected ego

A Cinders Passion

So they tell me my poetry is always serious and that I never speak of passion...
huh well passion can never be ignited until you find your prince charming

Every Cinderella has her tale...
mine was always one never told because see when I move in the room
I claim everything in it
right down from the bar to the music to the dance floor of life
but u can always tell when they can't handle you...ladies you know what am saying
like when he step to you thinking he got game and just one little wiggle sends
him perspiring, a little gyrating sends his heart doing gymnastics and this snake realises huh
he cannot mate with a lioness

Or when you get the know it all Mr
the one that walk in the room tryna conquer all
thinking a few drinks and a little charm will be enough to show... he the king in this bitch
when what he really is, is a spectator that's watched too much of the discovery channel
that he don't know when you step in the real jungle
a lioness ain't that easy to tame....

so now you all alone on that dance floor..o so it seems
you handling your business swaying that thing and then a tap on your shoulder
gentle as the whispering rain
subtle as a wind blowing on your neck
your knees buckle into submission as the control channels through just that one little touch
as he softly compliments you and tells you just how beautiful you look

see, huh he ain't about the competition, he about the confidence and like a true lion
he knows how to make his queen feel like a gazebo because in his kingdom
she is his subject and all this communicated through a gentle touch.

then as the music plays,one rhythm after another your bodies naturally intertwine
to every beat he takes control and moulds you into every crevice of his body
you feel him breath softly downyour neck stripping every mindless desire as your body
tells him begs him and surrenders in the midst of it all....

and slowly his mind undresses you and your arch sees it
yet you cant stop the feeling you are at his mercy
he now makes you perspire and your pores give birth to your unspoken desires
one look in his eyes and it starts to pour
rivers starts flowing forming an ocean at the mouth of your cave
your lips tingle and your tongue learns salsa as it seeks to engage in this passionate dance that should last forever....even if forever is but a second.

Everything stands still...the music stops apart from the beat in your heart
your spirits are locked in that perfect picture
resting your hand on his chest and the other round his neck
he gets the sweet promise of your tender lips on him again
your tender kisses right on every part
from the top right down to the bottom

He knows he cannot let you go without cupids permission
for in that moment to do so would be the perfect crime
he holds you for a while longer and takes you in his mouth
a kiss so intense that only his hand would stop this ocean from overflowing
in his eyes you see the power
in this tongue you feed the passion
whats in his heart you know not
but in due season
you understand the movement of him was the very heart of you
your giant prince
and you his Cinderella